SYBD NC Journal & Daily Planner: To Help You Move On
Back in 2000, on So You’ve Been Dumped‘s forums, I believe we pretty much introduced the whole concept of “no contact” (also known as the “no contact rule” or simply NC) – as a way of getting over your ex.
Now SYBD is almost 19 years old, and we’re celebrating that anniversary with a brand new ‘NC Journal and Daily Planner’. It’s a 365 Day no contact diary designed to help anyone who is practicing NC after a breakup or dating situation.
Have Something to Say to Your Ex? Say It Here, NOW.
Arguably one of SYBD’s most popular forum posts was started in around 2006 and called the Dead Message Office. It had many thousands of views and hundreds of comments. It wasn’t started by me, sadly, I wished it had been, it was amazing. The thread was place to allow dumpees to vent anything they wanted to say to their ex. Whenever your wanted to say something, anything at all – big or small, you just opened that thread and added whatever it was you wanted to say to him or her.
It was painful to read at times, because it featured every raw emotion imaginable – the good, the bad, the happy, the sad, and anything and everything in between.
Eventually when the SYBD forum itself closed, I resurrected that popular topic in a post called Have Something to Say to Your Ex, Say It Here Now...which, too, became one of our most popular blog posts over the past decade.
Again hundreds of responses on it – which therefor has inspired this line of journals and day planners. (I can’t believe it’s taken me so long to launch it as I’ve been doing journals and planners for around five months now…but better late than never).
No Contact & Exes – A Bastardized Technique
Over the last two decades (nearly), no contact has often become bastardized, to be more of a tactic to win an ex back.
I’ve never been a fan of trying to do anything to get your ex back, but rather advocate focusing on yourself and your own healing.
Sure, sometimes no contact can lead to reconciliation, but that is not my reason for recommending it. No contact gives a person the chance to do a bit of healing, growing, and learning – without all the temptation that calls, texts, chats and sex with an ex can bring.
You should never have to coerce, persuade, or win an ex back. Someone either wants to be with your or they don’t. Winning doesn’t come into it when it comes to exes.
Work on being your best self for the best results going forward…Maybe you’ll reconcile and maybe you won’t but either way you’ll be all the better for the experience.
The SYBD NC Journal & Daily Planner – What it Is and Who It Helps
The SYBD NC Journal and Daily Planner is my no contact journal and year-long day planner which has launched on Amazon this week. (More will be launching soon but let’s explain what this one is all about for now).
Both the title and its cover were deliberately designed to be totally inconspicuous and gender neutral. In fact the title is only printed on the spine!
It’s a fairly compact 6″ x 9″, 365-day planner, with a page a day that contains an hourly break down.
There’s a bit of space to keep a note of what “no contact day” it is for you and what percent of your thoughts were consumed by your ex. (Note: Sorry but if you break no contact, you need to start your count over. Thems the rules.)
As for the thoughts about your ex, that bit is designed to show you your progress as time goes on.
It is likely that, in a matter of days or weeks or possibly months, that your percentage should drop to almost nothing,…That my friends honestly that’s an awesome feeling. When you realize you have barely thought about your ex (or even not at all), it’s a good day indeed.
The second area for short notes found on the right hand side is labelled “What I want to say to my ex today”.
There isn’t a large amount of space, so it might be something simple like: “I miss you” or “I hate you” or “I had a dream about you…” Anything really can be jotted down in short form fashion*.
This premier NC Journal edition, available now, starts on July 1, 2019 and goes until June 31, 2020, but my plan is to update the inside of the book on a monthly basis.
*Another NC Journal will be launching soon and will have much more space to write everything you want to say and truly vent to your heart’s content. That one is coming before SYBD’s 19th birthday on July 4, 2019.
By the way, if you have ideas of what you’d like in a NC journal or diary, leave a comment below or message me: info @ soyouvebeendumped.com and I will see what I can do for you!
Look for the Good and Praise It!
Finally, at the bottom of every single page of your NC day planner, there is space to write about the good things that happened that day.
My mother used to have a hair salon in our house, in the 1970s, and on the mirror there, a bumper sticker read, “look for the good and praise it”. It wasn’t until I was dumped in 1999 by a soulmate, that I really started to understand what the childhood sticker meant.
The thing to remember is, the more you actively look for good, the more good you start to notice (and even attract, but that’s a different kind of journal, about manifesting!)
So use this space to write down the good things that happened to you, or that you witnessed, and anything that you may be grateful for.
It’s all about that attitude of gratitude. Eventually you may surprise yourself by being grateful that you’re no longer with your ex! Truly. It happens more often than you think.
Trust me, I’ve been running SYBD for almost twenty years, most people bounce back to something better after a break up. They not only survive but they thrive. You can too, I promise you, but only if you want to.
Pick Up the ‘SYBD NC Journal and Daily Planner’ Today.
Thanks for reading. If you do want to vent to your ex, feel free to do it the comments below.
Please note: The NC journal’s also available on other Amazon’s around the world – including Germany, France, Spain, Italy and Japan!
Watch this space for the SYBD No Contact Journal – it’s coming really soon!